The one where I get married tomorrow

The first time I walked down that aisle, my Dad was standing at the altar. I had a wreath of flowers on my head and was carrying a basket-full of rose petals. I nervously made it to the end of the aisle where my brother David the ring-bearer stood.

It was the first of many weddings I would see my Dad officiate.

At every wedding I've seen him do he always kept it short and sweet, he always made them laugh, and he always said these words… "now repeat after me…"

Tomorrow afternoon I will walk down that aisle with my Dad by my side and I will nervously make it to the end where I will meet more than just my older brother. After giving me away, my Dad will then stand at that altar and say…

"now repeat after me…"

"…to have and to hold in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse, forsaking all others until death do us part."

My advice to anyone is to know these vows, even if it's just in the back of your mind, or the general idea is grasped, you need to read them. Know that when you start dating someone and you think you might want to marry that person, what you're really saying is…I love and like you enough to be with you forever. I would love you and stand by your side even if you lost your health, wealth or even your common sense. I'm serious. This is serious.

There is a lot of weight in the vows taken at a wedding and it would be a shame for someone to hear them for the first time at their own. 

So please google it or ask a pastor for a copy of theirs and just know that it's for real. Culture may not think so, the whole world may not think so. Hollywood definitely doesn't think so. But you have to know that the last thing your wedding is about is your dress, hair, makeup or flowers You could cut all of that out and just have a pastor, a witness and those vows and it would be just as meaningful to God. Because, after all, you're not just standing before your pastor. You're standing before God.

At the end my Dad always says "What God has put together, let no man put asunder"...that is one of my favorite parts, because he gets this powerful tone in his voice and it's like he's speaking it with all his might, with the power of God backing him up. proclaiming the sanctity of what has just happened... What is about to happen...

A Series of Domesticated Roommates

I've moved around quite a bit over the past 2 years… I've lived with about 15 different people. In each of the last 4 places I've lived I've had a roommate who is especially gifted in the area of domesticity (or making a house a home and keeping it pretty). Now, on my own i would say that making a house a home means that people have to live in it. I know this is partly true, but i've come to learn that the way you keep your house has something to do with it too.

i'm watching an old old couple right now in Barnes and Noble, they are in their 80's at least. The wife just picked a better homes magazine and flipped cautiously through the pages like they were made of tissue paper, her husband pinched down the two pages that kept wanting to impede on what she was reading. she pulls out her reading glasses to read and after a second, decides they should just buy it. she stays, standing guard with her purse and piece of cheesecake while her husband takes the better homes magazine to be purchased. I'm guessing it would have taken twice as long for both of them to make the walk.

I'm getting married in 64 days and 5 hours. I'm about to step into the position of Mrs. Domesticity. To many women this is a dream come true…what they've always waited for! A house to settle down in and make pretty. For me it's precisely what I never expected. (Isn't that how God works? (rhetorical)). I expected to move into a hut in africa…or…at best, a temporary apartment in the U.S.

But no, God is blessing me with an amazing husband and an actual house…one with a secure roof and a backyard. Not just any backyard at that. This backyard has a fountain! a fountain!!! Oh, and I'm not finished, it has not one, but TWO sheds. One for Joe to call his man cave and one for me to call my art studio (don't tell Joe but I might be more excited about that than the actual house).

You know how the Bible says to honor the Lord, to be righteous, to walk out your faith and be concerned with the things of God and He will give you the desires of your heart…He will take care of the rest if you will just do the task he's placed in front of you and work on the heart he's placed inside of you?

Well, This season, this man, this house, this financial security is God keeping his promises to me. I am in the middle of God going above and beyond what I could have ever wished for or imagined.

So hold on. Hold on if you've been waiting for your dreams to come true. They truly will and they honestly might not look a thing like what you expected. In your deepest darkest times, open your ears to His whispered promises. Listen closely and hold them with your hand wide open.

The place I never thought I'd be

I've been trying to figure out lately where my mind was when all the other girls were planning their weddings and dreaming of prince charming. I imagine it would have been like that scene from the beginning of bridewars where the two girls are playing wedding upstairs in the attic. I did have friends who wanted to play some sort of dream relationship. One friend wanted to sing love songs to the guy she liked. but the only love songs she knew were worship songs. and the only other person in the room was me. which was rather convenient for her since I looked a lot like my older brother.The object of her affection. Yeah.

I'll give you a second to recover with me.

So I imagine that scene from bride wars and I think, if you had looked out of the attic window, you would have seen someone inspecting some inanimate object like a leaf or a dead blade of grass. That gawky little girl with big frizzy hair, glasses, acne, and too much of the wrong shade of foundation. mesmerized and completely content. That would be me. 

My mom said my incredible awkwardness was just God protecting me from all the guys out there. Well, God is pretty genius. I didn't have my first boyfriend until i was in my mid-twenties.

Don't get me wrong. Every once in a while I'd attract a guy. but it was usually another ploy from God to keep them away. They were typically "not my type"…at all.

Once I was at a wrestling match with a friend, for her brother. She didn't have the same protective shield that God so graciously provided me with. She was pretty. So when she so easily would talk to a guy, i would sit awkwardly next to his friend, watching them flirt. well, I guess he wanted to strike up a conversation so he pulled out his wallet…i watched him flip through little papers as he said, look what my aunt gave me… I had my first sideways-angle view of a condom. But i didn't know that's what it was at the time. Most guys I knew or talked to didn't even carry wallets (I babysat a lot). Now let me help you picture my face. You know when your friend is really excited to show you something and you want to be excited with them but you have no idea what it is. it's that face of interested confusion while saying "ooooooh, huh, cooooooool". I don't know what happened after that. I'm pretty sure he got up and walked away.

Yeah. so, again, I'm trying to remember what I was doing when my friends were planning their weddings and I'm pretty sure I was jumping up and down on my mom's bed with my best friend singing that sandi-patti song, Friends, "F.R.I. E.N.D., THAT IS WHAT WE'RE HERE TO BE"

I was more interested in playing and jumping and creating brilliant dances and skits to sandi patti songs. Now, a cool story would be that I grew up to be a brilliant dancer or actress. But, no, I find myself in this place I never thought I'd be. In a serious relationship…thinking about marriage. AAAHHHH freak out with me please, if you know me at all. (If you're thinking, oh my gosh i can't believe she's writing this on her blog…it's ok, we've talked about it, he's kind of a planner). But there's something amazing about it. There's something so (…I wish i had a better word, but…) amazing about spending time with someone who makes you laugh louder than you did at your best friends sweet 16 slumber party; or makes you act goofier than you did at midnight in buying cookie dough at walmart with your best friends. There's something so inspiring about a relationship that makes you want to write more, create more, drink more (water)  so that when you're together you don't have a headache from dehydration. Want to know what else is so amazing? Dating someone amazing has made me want to start cooking!? WHAT? who am I? I'm actually going to leave you with that final note since I"m on my way to my grandma's to learn how to make rolled grapeleaves…no, I'm not kidding and I'm not from the 17th century, I'm going to take cooking lessons from my grandma. Because being in love makes you do things you wouldn't normally do.