A Series of Domesticated Roommates

I've moved around quite a bit over the past 2 years… I've lived with about 15 different people. In each of the last 4 places I've lived I've had a roommate who is especially gifted in the area of domesticity (or making a house a home and keeping it pretty). Now, on my own i would say that making a house a home means that people have to live in it. I know this is partly true, but i've come to learn that the way you keep your house has something to do with it too.

i'm watching an old old couple right now in Barnes and Noble, they are in their 80's at least. The wife just picked a better homes magazine and flipped cautiously through the pages like they were made of tissue paper, her husband pinched down the two pages that kept wanting to impede on what she was reading. she pulls out her reading glasses to read and after a second, decides they should just buy it. she stays, standing guard with her purse and piece of cheesecake while her husband takes the better homes magazine to be purchased. I'm guessing it would have taken twice as long for both of them to make the walk.

I'm getting married in 64 days and 5 hours. I'm about to step into the position of Mrs. Domesticity. To many women this is a dream come true…what they've always waited for! A house to settle down in and make pretty. For me it's precisely what I never expected. (Isn't that how God works? (rhetorical)). I expected to move into a hut in africa…or…at best, a temporary apartment in the U.S.

But no, God is blessing me with an amazing husband and an actual house…one with a secure roof and a backyard. Not just any backyard at that. This backyard has a fountain! a fountain!!! Oh, and I'm not finished, it has not one, but TWO sheds. One for Joe to call his man cave and one for me to call my art studio (don't tell Joe but I might be more excited about that than the actual house).

You know how the Bible says to honor the Lord, to be righteous, to walk out your faith and be concerned with the things of God and He will give you the desires of your heart…He will take care of the rest if you will just do the task he's placed in front of you and work on the heart he's placed inside of you?

Well, This season, this man, this house, this financial security is God keeping his promises to me. I am in the middle of God going above and beyond what I could have ever wished for or imagined.

So hold on. Hold on if you've been waiting for your dreams to come true. They truly will and they honestly might not look a thing like what you expected. In your deepest darkest times, open your ears to His whispered promises. Listen closely and hold them with your hand wide open.

The place I never thought I'd be

I've been trying to figure out lately where my mind was when all the other girls were planning their weddings and dreaming of prince charming. I imagine it would have been like that scene from the beginning of bridewars where the two girls are playing wedding upstairs in the attic. I did have friends who wanted to play some sort of dream relationship. One friend wanted to sing love songs to the guy she liked. but the only love songs she knew were worship songs. and the only other person in the room was me. which was rather convenient for her since I looked a lot like my older brother.The object of her affection. Yeah.

I'll give you a second to recover with me.

So I imagine that scene from bride wars and I think, if you had looked out of the attic window, you would have seen someone inspecting some inanimate object like a leaf or a dead blade of grass. That gawky little girl with big frizzy hair, glasses, acne, and too much of the wrong shade of foundation. mesmerized and completely content. That would be me. 

My mom said my incredible awkwardness was just God protecting me from all the guys out there. Well, God is pretty genius. I didn't have my first boyfriend until i was in my mid-twenties.

Don't get me wrong. Every once in a while I'd attract a guy. but it was usually another ploy from God to keep them away. They were typically "not my type"…at all.

Once I was at a wrestling match with a friend, for her brother. She didn't have the same protective shield that God so graciously provided me with. She was pretty. So when she so easily would talk to a guy, i would sit awkwardly next to his friend, watching them flirt. well, I guess he wanted to strike up a conversation so he pulled out his wallet…i watched him flip through little papers as he said, look what my aunt gave me… I had my first sideways-angle view of a condom. But i didn't know that's what it was at the time. Most guys I knew or talked to didn't even carry wallets (I babysat a lot). Now let me help you picture my face. You know when your friend is really excited to show you something and you want to be excited with them but you have no idea what it is. it's that face of interested confusion while saying "ooooooh, huh, cooooooool". I don't know what happened after that. I'm pretty sure he got up and walked away.

Yeah. so, again, I'm trying to remember what I was doing when my friends were planning their weddings and I'm pretty sure I was jumping up and down on my mom's bed with my best friend singing that sandi-patti song, Friends, "F.R.I. E.N.D., THAT IS WHAT WE'RE HERE TO BE"

I was more interested in playing and jumping and creating brilliant dances and skits to sandi patti songs. Now, a cool story would be that I grew up to be a brilliant dancer or actress. But, no, I find myself in this place I never thought I'd be. In a serious relationship…thinking about marriage. AAAHHHH freak out with me please, if you know me at all. (If you're thinking, oh my gosh i can't believe she's writing this on her blog…it's ok, we've talked about it, he's kind of a planner). But there's something amazing about it. There's something so (…I wish i had a better word, but…) amazing about spending time with someone who makes you laugh louder than you did at your best friends sweet 16 slumber party; or makes you act goofier than you did at midnight in buying cookie dough at walmart with your best friends. There's something so inspiring about a relationship that makes you want to write more, create more, drink more (water)  so that when you're together you don't have a headache from dehydration. Want to know what else is so amazing? Dating someone amazing has made me want to start cooking!? WHAT? who am I? I'm actually going to leave you with that final note since I"m on my way to my grandma's to learn how to make rolled grapeleaves…no, I'm not kidding and I'm not from the 17th century, I'm going to take cooking lessons from my grandma. Because being in love makes you do things you wouldn't normally do.

Let's say...

Let's say you sit in a coffee shop and start typing. Then, let's say you notice some guy staring at you out of the corner of your eye. What would you do? you should probably just keep typing. (That didn't actually happen... hence the 'let's say')

Let's say you own a coffee shop and you want to attract customers…would you turn the A/C on? please turn the A/C on…

Let's say you want to write a blog but you can't because someone around the corner just burped so loud. 

Let's say you get annoyed with me saying "let's say".

the guys to my right are listening to you're a jerk…they work here…now one is dancing the dougie but i can't see him…now it's the running man

Let's say you could rap like this…

I just showed this video to the coffee shop guys and their response was…"she would make the most awesomest wife"….mental noting that one...

then they watched this…

skill, right?

I thought I was going to be a little more deep today...or share some of my heart... Buttttttt I wasn't quite feeling deep enough...maybe soon I'll have a more insightful blog with some super fun details about my life... but not tonight :)

Enjoy, ya?

What's the big Idea?

I'm about to go home and do an art project. I just wanted to share the inspiration with you all because I think it's pretty stinking cool...

Picture from www.megduerkson.typepad.com

check out her process here!

I'll try to post some pics of mine soon!

P.S. I am sitting outside of a coffee shop and I've recently been contemplating if it's wrong to go into coffee shops and not get anything to drink. I tend to go in just to people watch and use the internet... thoughts?

Have a great Tuesday!

To become a Christian you must first read and understand every other religion in the world. Otherwise you are narrow minded...

There are two men sitting across from me speaking in arabic. 

When I saw them walking in I thought it was funny because they look like italian mobsters. dressed really nicely and driving fancy cars. There was one connection I failed to make.

They came in while I was reading… Immediately one started calling me a name. Not an inappropriate name, an actual name, like runna or something. I didn't realize they were talking to me. I looked up and they said, are you runna? Nope. Oh, they said, you look exactly like our friend's daughter. Oh, haha. Turns out I could actually be their cousin.

They asked if I was arabic. I am syrian. they are lebanese. I listed of some of my families' last names like a good arabic girl, one of them said, oh, you're a Barraket? (well, yes, kind of, I'm related to the Barraket's, we actually say Barket, but Barraket is the proper way, just roll the R and add an a). 

cousin.

they then wanted me to prove my syrian residency, joking of course. They settled for the fact that I knew what taboulli was.

Then they tested my arabic, of which I speak none. They asked if I knew the arabic word for money. their way of asking was using the arabic word for money. I of course, to reiterate my point, said no. I don't know what massa-something means. Oh, haha, you no use no money, haha. Oh, haha, I said, yeah my parents never taught me arabic, they thought I said my parents didn't teach me money. sooo funny.

one just got up to leave, they have been sitting across from me this whole time. 

the other older one asks again for my dad's name. he's sure he's met him. I show him a picture of him and my mom on my computer. still nothing…

We never drew the connection but I'm sure it has something to do with real estate.

since he didn't go back to his seat I felt somewhat obligated to keep talking. he asked how many boyfriends I have. I probably should have lied. and said at least one. it was far from my mind that he would be hitting on me. He was like 40! I told him I go to the church around the corner and have a lot of guy friends who are like brothers. Just to get the point across that if I went missing people would notice. 

To try to deter him or at least turn off his desire for conversation I took the conversation in a direction I thought would cause him to leave. God and church. I very quickly felt like I was talking to an art student at UNF. He believes in the whole there are many ways to God. different religions are all right. no one is wrong. as long as you believe there is a God. 

well, hello every person I every reached out to in college. I knew exactly how it would end as soon as it started. Let's agree to disagree. 

But I couldn't just end it. I was in this conversation. somewhat unprepared. 

To type out everything we discussed would take a while…I'll do some bullet points:

-who Jesus is. (we disagreed)

-how to choose your religion(we disagreed)

-who goes to heaven or hell (we disagreed)

-how to talk about religion and what you believe (we disagreed)

-if the Bible is truth(disagreed)

Someone once said, in order to argue well, one must start with communicating the definitions. we can argue over how to run a business but if we don't define certain words or what the business is, we will argue in circles.

I must say, there were many times when I was lost for words. Then there were times when I had too many words and had to choose them wisely. Ultimately he wanted me to talk about religion and God without posing my own beliefs. I explained that I cannot separate who I am from what I believe. He found that among many things that I said to be bogus.

Five Books:

He posed a question. He was trying to explain that I am only a Christian because it is how I was raised and If I were raised another religion I would be that. 

question: if you had no prior knowledge of the Bible and you were told to go into this room with 5 books on a table. you have to choose which one you will follow to live your life. how would you choose? 

I answered, well, I would read one, taking into account how it affects me and then read the next until I found the right one.

He felt he made his point. I've only read the Bible and since I haven't read all the other options I am narrow minded and what I think is the only way to Christ is only that because it's all I know.

I answered back: Do you mind if I ask you a question. Sure he said, proud and smiling and intrigued.

I asked. Let's say you are put in a room with 5 women. One of them is to become your wife. 

Do you have sex with each one to figure out who your wife is?

He answered, if that is an option, then yes.

I answered back: See, this is where I disagree. I don't think I need to know every book in order to know that the Bible is the Truth. The absolute truth.

The conversation went on. and as I suspected we ended on me saying. Let's just agree to disagree. He laughed. because in his mind, he still agrees with me. and every other religion. (I've been to enough interfaith committee meetings to know the difference between modern tolerance and the definition of tolerance.) I will and did listen to his opinion and made it clear that I disagree and he made it clear that I'm being narrow minded. I agreed. proudly.

My friends are at Metro Diner and I'm being a loner...so I blogged

I came here today, not to blog, but to read. 

and of course something happened I can't help but write about…

A man comes in and sits a chair over from me with his leather crocs and polo shirt, probably in his forties.

Three little girls come in- hi daddy!

"sup real dog…" (no joke, that's what he said to his daughters)

they all come up and hug him, probably 10, 8 and 5.

the two younger are holding hands, more for the sake of the 5 year old not running off.

they come up to the comfy seat next to me and as the baby goes to sit the older one pulls her arm back so she could sit first…typical older sibling.

so they both sit right next to me…I look over and the baby girl is staring at me with her bangs in her face and her mouth open…I melted.

she then got up and started twirling in front of her family. for no other reason than she felt like it. she twirled and twirled and won my heart.

she's actually 2.

she went over to sit back down but now both older sisters were in the chair and wouldn't let her in. while she was dancing and bringing joy to her father, and inadvertently, me, her sisters took her spot.

just as she was about to start crying and shoving her way in her daddy says, come here sweetie, patting his knee, come sit with me.

she goes gladly, forgetting the rejection she just faced-because of it she got a seat with her father.

he held her and rocked her and tickled her.

then she threw her arms up and fell back in total confidence and security.

Daddy missed.

she bumped her head on the corner of the chair.

she started crying and he apologized profusely and just held and rocked her and she laid her head on his chest as he held her.

she's fine now. she's defending the fact that her sister's birthday is actually her own. it's not really but when you're two, everybody's birthday is your birthday, especially your siblings'.

I am loving this sweet little family. this perfect example of how life with your father should be. he showed them his love and played with them, and because he's human one was hurt, but he was there to comfort her until she was ready to play again. 

I know it's random again, but again, I'll try to leave you with something…this time I really have a sweet tip/link. I'll share it as the sweet 2 year old starts twirling again :)

here's the sweet reward for reading my blog today!

DC Cup of Joe!

free coffee!!! just use your smart phone, take a pic of this barcode (it's a community starbucks card) and use it to get your drink! If you're feeling really wild, make someone's day and contribute to the card. You may need it someday.

Shout out to the world changer known as Anna Haberlein. making a difference one free coffee cup at a time.

But seriously. check it out. drop a few bucks. it's fun!

Tazo tea and lip liner

So I'm sitting in a starbucks. Surrounded by people at a table by myself.

In front of me are three men. two at a table together and one who just picked up his newspaper and walked out.

The two men are having a very intentional conversation. The one with the Tazo tea is doing all the talking, using his hands like an orchestrater. the other gentleman sips his coffee, says something lightly and the tea man carries on.

In front of me to my left are three women. one just leaned over to sniff the other's neck then hands her a small ziplock bag that she then sniffs. 

Behind me is a group of 20 somethings speaking a different language. Maybe swiss or dutch? They are all blonde. the women in front of me are all brunette. the men in front of me are both grey and balding. Birds of a feather really do flock together.

The tea man just told a story about someone's arm being chopped off, I think, by the way he held out one arm and used the other hand to chop it off.

The people sitting behind me are incredibly trendy. One just walked to the bathroom and he was wearing black trousers, a suit vest, suspenders and a white collared shirt. It's 100 degrees out. what is he thinking. Also, he has black hair. not blonde.

The Coffee boy who called me gorgeous just stepped outside to take a smoke break.

The group behind me is more romanian I think. oddly enough none of them are blonde. 

I had a friend in high school from romania. I'll never forget her. She had a rough life and was blamed by her parents for the harm done to her. She made me promise to never tell or she would be disowned by them. 

Johnny and June just came on…I'm going to Jackson. 

After a five minute Facebook break the woman in front of me is STILL putting on lip liner. Maybe they're having a friday-lunch break-mary kay party- at starbucks??? weird.

Since this blog is so stinking random and somewhat aimless I thought I'd leave you with a link: 

changed my mind. I'll leave you with a quote: 

Actually, none is coming to mind.

I want so badly to leave you with something to make this worth your while. (if anyone is still reading this). aha. free art.

Leave a comment (a quote you love, a link to something sweet, etc.). The fifth person to comment on this blog will get one of my paintings. to guarantee you'll actually get one, I have it already made.

rules:

(you can only comment once, and it can't be back to back)- (this one's for all you strategists).

two business men just sat behind me. I'm not sure but I think it's going to be boring. Peace!